


Planning is Overrated

by Darth_Cass



Series: Sam And Max Wedding Week 2021 [3]
Category: Sam & Max (Comics)
Genre: Dancing, Fluff and Humor, M/M, So apparently I'm the first person to use the Leonard steakcharmer character tag, cartoonish violence (r.i.p Leornard), so that's fun, spoilers for season 1 episode 3 of the telltale games kinda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:54:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28598790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darth_Cass/pseuds/Darth_Cass
Summary: Max wants to practice dancing for his and Sam's upcoming wedding. But it turns out you need a partner to practice, who knew? Written for Sam and Max Wedding Week 2021
Relationships: Max/Sam (Sam & Max)
Series: Sam And Max Wedding Week 2021 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2093796
Kudos: 31





	Planning is Overrated

Sam was out on some errand; he didn’t catch the specifics but apparently it was an errand that would be accomplished easier without Max's 'particular brand of hyperkinetic chaos' (Sam's words naturally). Normally the lagomorph hated being alone in the office. Loneliness led to boredom and a bored Max, 9 times of 10, led to something that would make national news (during that final tenth time he’d just watch TV). This time however he had a plan.

Max would be the first to admit that he wasn’t really the planning type, preferring to deal with most problems with violent spontaneity, which normally worked out for him. After all, it was because of said spontaneity that he and Sam were engaged. Yes, he and Sam were getting married soon, a fact that delighted him more than words could describe. There was just one problem, however. Married couples were generally expected to dance at these sorts of things and Max knew that both he and Sam were terrible dancers. This fact normally didn’t bother him, but he knew that Sam was the type that appreciated big romantic moments, he was kind of a sap that way. Max was determined to try to practice his dancing so that he could surprise and woo his dear husband off his feet.

He still wasn’t the type to try to plan things out, but for Sam he was willing to try.

During a visit with Sybil, Max had learned that one of her previous jobs was that of a dance instructor. She was too busy with her current job (either elephant chiropractor or graphic t-shirt designer, he couldn’t remember which) to teach him in person but she had an old tape of waltzing lessons that she agreed to lend him. That seemed like the kind of grand romantic type of dancing that’d be wedding appropriate after all.

As soon as he was sure that Sam was gone and that he had the office to himself Max put the tape in.

"Hello, and welcome to Sybil's Sensational Dancing lessons, I'm your instructor Sybil Pademik. Welcome to part 1 of my multi-part dancing series. This tape focuses on the waltz, if you're wanting to learn the tango please put in tape 2, if you're looking for the can-can put in tape 3, for Stuttgartian folk dancing please put in tape 4..."

"Boooooring" Max groaned. He could already feel himself zoning out in a near dissociative daze before slapping himself to pay attention. This was for Sam after all.

"Now the first thing you're going to need is a dance partner," the Sybil on the TV explained.

"Dammit!" Max exclaimed; he really wasn’t good at this whole planning thing.

"If another person isn’t available feel free to use a dummy stand in," Sybil explained, oblivious to the lagomorph's annoyance. "Such as the one I have here." The video then showed Sybil with a sort of headless mannequin on wheels. Max paused the video and immediately began looking around the office for something to use.

"C'mon Max think of something," he mumbled to himself. The punching bag? No there were no wheels so it wouldn't work. Maybe he could ~~force~~ convince Jimmy Two-Teeth to help? Nah that'd take so long that by the time the rat was appropriately convinced, Sam would be back. Plus there was the whole 'he's a small rat thing'. He could go next door and ask Flint Paper to be his dance partner? No, Flint was way too cool and busy with real detective work to help out.

As Max considered all of his options his gaze turned toward the closet door. He grinned as soon as he remembered the closet's contents. It was like a lightbulb went off as he realized who'd be the _perfect_ dummy.

\--‐--------------------------------------------------

Sam whistled to himself as he parked the DeSoto in its usual spot. This dress fitting for the wedding went a lot faster than he anticipated. Which worked out perfectly since Sam was well aware of what his partner was like when gone for too long. Sam could relate to his little buddy’s feelings and also appreciate the creativity in Max’s boredom-based rampant destruction. He hated being away from Max for too long as well but there were times it was necessary. The separation sucked but the reuniting was always nice. There was something about the way Max’s eyes would light up whenever Sam got back that made him feel all mushy inside, as if he were falling in love with the lagomorph all over again. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, after all.

The building didn’t appear to be on fire which was already a step up from the last few occasions Sam left his partner alone. He made his way into the building and then stopped just before his office door. He couldn’t hear any screaming, which was frankly a little unusual but not too concerning. What was unusual was the sounds of classical music, a woman’s voice that sounded remarkably similar to their good friend Sybil, and in fact was probably Sybil, and the distinct sounds of Max’s feet walking around. Okay that last one wasn’t too unusual, but the others were. Sam opened the door, both curious and a little wary about what he might see.

“Holy tap-dancing Chihuahuas trying to make it big on Broadway!” he exclaimed. 

Laid out before his very eyes was the image of Max dancing with their favourite closest hostage Leonard (who was still tied up and gagged naturally) while a video of Sybil dipping some sort of mannequin played. Max appeared to be holding Leonard in a dip in a pretty close imitation of the video

It wasn’t anything too weird overall, didn’t even make the top ten, but Sam certainly was not expecting to return to this.

Max’s eyes widened in shock as he turned toward Sam. He wasn’t expecting Sam back for at least another hour. He immediately dropped Leonard, who fell to the ground with a malnourished and exhausted thud. “Oh hi, Sam,” he said in what was meant to be a nonchalant tone, “you’re back early.”

“Hi yourself there, Max. What sort of wacky hijinks have you gotten yourself involved in this time?”

“Oh, not much, just became general of an army made up entirely of frogs that were trying to take their pond back from an invasive lizard army. Ultimately both armies died due to the surprise appearance of geese. Such a tragic loss of life.” 

“What does any of that have to do with dancing with Leonard” 

“Not a single thing!”

“You crack me up little buddy,” Sam smiled and kissed the top of Max’s head. He then turned toward the TV and the video that was still playing and paused it. “Is that Sybil doing some sort of waltz?”

Max grumbled, “It was supposed to be a surprise.”

“Well, a video of Sybil dancing is surprising I suppose. She is a multi-faceted woman with a wide array of talents in her skill-set but a video of her showing demonstrating one of her talents is new.”

“Don’t say multi-faceted, Sam.” Max turned away from Sam, and focused on a not particularly interesting part of the wall. “Iwaspracticingdancingforthewedding-“

“What was that? I didn’t quite catch it.”

Max sighed and still didn’t make eye contact with Sam. “I was practicing dancing for the wedding. I was gonna’ surprise you with my super sweet moves for our first dance before _someone_ came home too early and ruined the surprise.”

“You did all this just to surprise me?” Max nodded and Sam pet Max’s head affectionately, “That’s awfully sweet of you little pal, are you going soft on me?”

“You wish, Sam.” He refused to give Sam the satisfaction of turning toward him, but the lagomorph did still lean into Sam’s touch, purring involuntarily. 

“I’m sorry I ended up ruining the surprise, but, since I’m here anyway, you want to try practicing together? That way we can surprise all our guests by almost knowing what we’re doing.” 

“Yeah okay, you’ll be a far better partner than Leonard anyway. He was mumbling something the entire time and kept falling down like standing was such an ordeal. You’d think a guy who lives in a closet would enjoy the chance to stretch his legs!”

“Did you remember to feed him today?”

“Not sure.” Max turned toward Sam and reached for his hand placing one of Sam’s hands on his waist and holding the other. “Just follow my lead Max- I mean Sam.” Sam nodded, and their practice dancing began. 

It wasn’t the most graceful affair. Toes were stepped on and directions were misunderstood. Max’s attempt at dipping Sam particularly did not go well, but Leonard broke his fall so no harm done. It wasn’t prefect but it was them which kind of made it perfect, at least as far as the two Freelance Police were concerned. 

It may not have gone the way Max planned but that was fine, planning was overrated. Spontaneity was clearly the way to go (just like with Leonard’s feeding schedule).

**Author's Note:**

> My initial plan for this day's prompt was something a little less cartoonishly violent. But then I remembered Leonard and whelp, here we are!
> 
> As always thank you to Billie for editing, you're so great and I appreciate you so much


End file.
